It usually comes out in the form of saying something entirely unnecessary and stupid. This has been happening for as long as I can remember.
This was not nearly as funny at the time.
As the years went by it only got worse. It evolved from silly outbursts protesting double standards, which I guess are kind of understandable, to in-depth conversations about something no one wants to hear,
to ENTIRELY UNCALLED-FOR RESPONSES to innocuous statements,
to just plain stupid remarks to coworkers hoping to get a laugh.
It only comes out when I’m around people I don’t know that well, which is just about the worst possible time. I mean, what better way to tell someone “hey, I’m a well-adjusted person who is well-suited for social situations and intelligent conversation”, than bustin’ out with “oh, you were popular in high school? Was your high school ON THE MOON?! HAHAHA I’M JUST KIDDING.”
Everybody wants to be friends with THAT guy, right?
I shudder to think what I’m going to be like in even just five years. And can you imagine when I’m SIXTY? I’m going to be that lady that just hangs around retail stores weirding people out until someone has to ask me to leave. Giving people CANDY out of DRIPPING PAPER BAGS.
We have those at Target. OH GOD WE HAVE THOSE AT TARGET.
That’s not a butterscotch. DON’T TAKE IT, KID I MADE UP. IT CAN ONLY END BADLY.
your opposite day enthusiasm is ENTHUSIASTIC! :D
ReplyDeleteI love baby!Kelli with braces, and how I can tell exactly when each of these occurred just because of your hair :D
ReplyDeletealso, I fell back on my bed in silent laughter after reading this.
I also love the weird old people skin color.
ReplyDeleteSee, I haven't seen any of this since I first met you (around when the second comic took place.) Since then you've been fucking hilarious around me. Yet I hear these stories about a completely different, retarded Kelli, and I wonder what she's like.
ReplyDeleteOmg old lady Kelli. I can be your husband that forgets to put pants on and walks into the store and takes ten minutes to ask an employee very nicely where the candies are so you can scalp them.. In my underwear
ReplyDeleteWow, this made a great laughter come from my face. I'm honored to have been the guy who asked the cheerleader for her soul, by the by. Assuming it was me. Unless there were two of us. But that would mean I had some kind of... twin, or something. I dunno. Comment kinda got away from me. Seriously though, your blog, she make-a me laugh.
ReplyDelete